The Problem With Inappropriate People Is That They Outnumber You

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“It’s the lady that came up to talk with you just before you preached. She’s the one who is driving us crazy. We just don’t know if we can go on leading this church with her involved.”

Believe it or not, this is a pretty common report I receive from pastors and their wives when I visit their church to help them and their elders overcome a problem, get unstuck, build a disciplemaking culture, or simply get healthy.

Let’s face it. Inappropriate people are the greatest drain on any leader, but especially pastors.

Here’s a summary of what I told this young pastor and his wife:

It doesn’t make any sense to spend your life proving her wrong or trying to meet her demands; it’s a losing battle.

Far more effective is the exhausting but exhilarating work of making disciples, building community, forming groups that love one another, and finding the very best you can in these people. Engage with them on the deepest level while you’re being as kind as you can toward this needy and inappropriate troublemaker.

You can’t possibly know what it’s like to be her, but it’s also true that she has no idea of the pressures you’re under and how the Lord is leading you to make this church relevant, alive, and healthy.

One more reason to obey the Lord’s Great Commandment to love one another.